I'll take the 10%: My Journey Through Chronic Fatigue, Benzo Withdrawal, DPDR and Psychosis

Warning

This website is for informational purposes only. I am not giving medical advice, and anything attempted based on what you read here will be your responsibility.

Background 

I believe I was dealt the best and worst hand simultaneously. I was very lucky in that I was intelligent, attractive (despite the overbite), and had a good childhood. On the other hand, I was a weird kid. I had a funny walk because of my pelvic tilt. I couldn’t breathe through my nose so I had forward head posture as a result. I had exercise intolerance and low energy. Although I was one of the top students in my class, I was slower than the other kids; I couldn’t think on the spot and couldn’t follow group conversations. My head was in the clouds. I would zone out of conversations, interrupting with 'what?' every so often. When I was 17 I wrote a song called ‘half awake, half asleep’. I just felt out of it and couldn’t connect to the outside world. Like watching life as a spectator. At the time I attributed this ‘feeling’ to tiredness. I was in fact completely dissociated, but I wasn’t going discover this until much later when I was in my thirties. It wasn't always like this; it happened gradually during my teenage years. The intent of this blog is to look back at every possible thing that could have happened, and reverse it accordingly. The blog's name 'Dental Disaster' refers to the bad orthodontics I had as a teenager, and was intented to track my progress with AGGA, however the blog later became a way to track all current health issues.

This is a picture of me age 11 before any dental treatment - I had a narrow/high palate, was a mouth breather and had an overbite. My orthodontist said that I had pushed my front teeth forward with my tongue and that I was going to need braces to push them back. We now know that they were in fact in the correct position, my palate just needed to be widened and lower jaw come forward. At 15 they put the braces on. My orthodontist pushed my face further back, and once the braces were off he attempted to ‘fix’ my overbite by making me wear an MAD (mandibular advancement device), which obviously didn’t work. Nothing about tongue posture or nasal breathing. I was also told that I needed all four wisdom teeth removed, which I complied with. At 18 the braces were removed. A few years after my orthodontic treatment was complete, my mother and I went back to his office to collect my file for our records. He sat us down opposite him, with my file open on his desk. As he flicked through the file, he told us how I was a “special case,” and that he wanted to keep my file if it was ok with us. He mentioned something about using it in a study. We agreed. Last year I called up the dental office to get my file (they are required by law to keep them). The lady at reception remembered me from all those years ago. She took a look at the paper records and told me that it was strange because it wasn't there. She said all the paper records were moved online in 2005 (before my treatment was finished). To her surprise, my file wasn’t on their system. You and I both know what’s happened here.

My health slowly declined shortly thereafter. I went to university in the UK but wasn’t myself. I developed brain fog and fatigue. I would feel tired all the time. I would need 12 hours to function, and 14 hours to feel good. I fell asleep in under a minute and slept all the way through. I went to see various doctors but nobody had answers. By the time university finished, I was in a constant fog. I knew this had something to do with sleep as I would wake up every morning and feel like I had been hit by a truck. I decided to get a sleep study done at the London Sleep Centre (shoutout to Dr. Irshaad Ebrahim) and sort this out so that I could start working, which wasn't possible in my current state. I remember stumbling into the centre, late and in a fog. He sat me down opposite him and after describing my symptoms to him, he lowered his head slightly, raised his eyebrows, and asked “are you a bit of a worrier?”. I remember being slightly offended because he had clearly misunderstood the extent of my symptoms - I was too out of it to even have thoughts of my own, let alone have anxious ones! Looking back what’s interesting is he never once asked me if I was a mouth breather. You would think this was a pretty big part of sleep. The test was abnormal and I was diagnosed with ‘Disorder of Arousal’. It’s not as exiting as it sounds, I had 13 arousals from sleep per hour but no apneas. I was put on a trial of Clonazepam, which I’ve been on and off since I was 24. The drug made me functional, and although didn’t help with the dissociation, helped me stay awake during the day and enabled me to work. By the time I was 29 I was taking 2mg a day of Clonazepam. I had previously come off them without any problems, but this time had to do a year long taper due to severe symptoms. During this time I was in a state of chronic anxiety and fear, but still functional. During the worst of it I had over 30 symptoms and the only thing I can compare it to is a bad mushroom trip. Your nervous system is turned up to 1000% and there’s nowhere to go. 

 

Benzo withdrawal (PAWS)

 

Below are the PAWS symptoms I experienced. Note, I did not have any symptoms until I began my taper, and no history of mental illness aside from fatigue and brain fog. Most of these cleared by the 2 year mark, some of the symptoms still linger.

 

Mental

• Terror
• Anxiety
• Panic attacks
• Racing thoughts
• Intrusive thoughts
• DP/DR
• Nightmares and night terrors 
• Sleep paralysis 
• Symptom obsession
  
• Thoughts coming from outside of me
• Paranoia
  

 Physical

• Muscle tension
• Burning Brain
• Burning skin
• Locked diaphragm
• Muscle weakness
• Couldn’t lift arms above head
• POTS
• Increased Breathing effort
• Metal taste
• Brain zaps
• Extremely tight jaw
• Intolerence to alcohol and caffeine
• Constipation
  

Ears

• Tinnitus
• Vertigo
• Strange head sensations driving up and down hills
• Boat sensation when walking 
• Couldn’t lean back
• Couldn’t lie flat

Eyes

• Photophobia
• Pareadelia 
• DP/DR
• Nystagmus

 

Anxiety

 

Benzo withdrawal literally opened me up. To the point where I could feel anxious energy coursing through my body. I could feel mini fireworks go off in my brain when I took certain supplements. I felt the effects a positive affirmation had on the body compared to a negative one. I could feel everything that was ‘under the bonnet’, if you will. I know this may sound strange to some, but please bear with me. I was able to make a distinction between 2 types of anxiety that I was experiencing.

1. Anxiety in the body caused by negative thoughts 
2. Baseline physical anxiety

Type 1. Imagine a scale that goes from -10 to +10, where 0 is neutral. Every time you have a negative thought you go down a level. Not only does your mood change, the energy in your body is actually affected. If you have a negative thought that carries a strong emotional reaction, this could take you down 3 or 5 levels. However, if you have a negative thought but then replace it with a positive one afterwards you stay the same. I was able to overcome type 1. by training myself to follow negative thoughts with a positive thought or affirmation. One thing I found is that you have to 'believe' the affirmation for it to be effective. I found that if I said an affirmation with enough conviction/willpower, I would get tingles at the base of my spine and my energy would change. This all sounds very woo woo and believe me I am the last person to believe in energy/vibration/whatever you want to call it, but I can only share what I experienced.

Type 2. Although I was able to master Type 1., I still had this strong baseline anxiety/tension throughout my body, which seemed to be ten times worse during sleep. Withdrawal was amplifying my underlying anxiety, but where was the underlying anxiety coming from if not from my thoughts? Why would it improve slightly if I sat up as tall and straight as I could? Why did I experience relief was when I was in child's pose with my jaw hanging down? It had something to do with alignment of my body and my jaw, but I didn’t know what. I had my big breakthrough in January 2019 when I randomly pushed my lower jaw forward 1-2 cm; let's call this the 'safe mark'. Within a few seconds, my symptoms went from excruciating to bearable. I'm talking intrusive/racing thoughts, audio hallucinations, brain fog, balance problems… all reduced drastically just by pushing my jaw forward. I began pushing my jaw forward all day just to avoid symptoms. But what about during sleep when my symptoms were worse? What if, I thought, I could hold my jaw forward all night? This is where my journey began. Bring on the MADness…..

Mandibular Advancement Device (MAD)

I went to my dentist and asked them to make me an MAD to hold my lower jaw forward during sleep. The blue things in the picture are quite rigid for the first few days and the bottom jaw is forcibly held still. The first night i wore this I woke up after 4 hours. Not only had most of my withdrawal symptoms decreased to a tolerable level, but the dissociation and brain fog I had experienced my whole life had gone. I was finally in the real world. I could follow a group conversation. I was making jokes. I had more energy than I knew what to do with. I could drive confidently. It’s a big moment you wake up and you realise your entire life has been a dream. Things literally looked 2 dimensional before, but now faces and objects had depth. I’ve been operating on Windows 95 the entire time and didn’t even know it. I was taking a walk with a friend and remember telling him this was the best day of my entire life.  This lasted for about 3 days while the upper and lower jaw were ‘fixed’ together with the blue things, but then symptoms returned, and I couldn’t understand why. It wasn’t until I swapped the blue things out for new ones that once again, that my symptoms disappeared for 3 days or so. This only worked if my lower jaw was held in a forward fixed position. But why? After experimenting for a few months, I discovered the reason: 

• IF the bottom jaw is held in a fixed forward position > jaw muscles relaxed. 
• IF jaw muscles are relaxed, this means that there is no resulting body tension (neck > back > stomach > inner thighs > ankles > feet). I know this is the case because I wake up without foot supination. 
• IF stomach muscles aren’t locked/tight, this means I can breathe through my nose, and therefore holding my mouth shut is not going to cause any problems. Also, tongue falling against the airway isn’t a problem either. 

However, this is what was happening after the blue things became loose after 3 days of use, and the bottom jaw was free to move up, down, and back.

• Mouth is falling open, and jaw falling back past the ‘safe mark'
• Just being past the safe mark causes anxiety symptoms within itself
• In addition to this, jaw is now constantly tenses trying to push forward
• IF jaw tenses, we get the resulting body tension throughout 
• IF we now have stomach tension, can no longer take full breaths out of the nose
• Which means the mouth has to open and the jaw has to tense to push forward even more
• BUT now the tongue is blocking the airway and the mouth doesn’t open wide because of the MAD.

In retrospect, what I should have done was buy a fixed MAD. But instead after 3 months of experimenting, decided to go for something which in theory should 1. hold my lower jaw forward within the ‘safe mark’, and 2. keep the lower jaw still/allow it to rest to reduce tension and the resulting physical symptoms . I got this MAD in April 2019:

This worked a lot better because it held my lower jaw forward past the ‘safe mark’. I experimented for several months and discovered that there were 5 separate things causing my symptoms:

1. Problem: Mandible being too far back, past the ‘safe mark'

• Causing: irritating/affecting the nervous system when its in its resting position causing tension / this is what made my benzo withdrawal symptoms worse 
• Symptoms: fatigue, brain fog, dissociation, balance problems
• Solved by: wearing MAD

2. Problem: Jaw muscles are tensed;

• Causing:  it tenses my body all the way to my toes, including my stomach muscles, which makes it difficult to get a full breath. Remember, the jaw is connected to the pelvis. When my jaw tenses, my pelvis tilts.
• Symptoms: jaw tension, pelvic tilt, muscle tension, foot supination, inward facing knees
• Solved by: wearing a fixed MAD forcing the jaw to relax, or sleeping face down on a massage table forcing the jaw to hang down.

3. Problem: Jaw tenses at the end of each inhale, and as it does my mandible gets pulled back past the ‘safe mark’

• Causing: combination of 1. , 2. and 5.
• Symptoms: all symptoms
• Solved by: wearing MAD (and I have a theory that CFR will solve this permanently - see section on CFR)

4. Problem: As jaw becomes more tense, mouth tries to close over and over throughout the night 

• Causing: sends strong anxiety jolts throughout the body
• Symptoms: anxiety, nightmares, sleep paralysis, hapagognic hallucinations
• Solved by: sleeping with a bottle between my mouth to stop my mouth from closing 

5. Problem: Tongue trying to rest against airway every 5 seconds when I’m not able to breathe through my nose

• Causing: sends anxiety jolts throughout the body
• Symptoms: anxiety & brain fog
• Solved by: sleeping on a raised wedge, with head tilted all the way back so that tongue cannot reach the airway

This MAD resolved problems 1. and 3. because it stops the jaw falling back. I found that if i slept on a raised wedge, with my head tilted back facing up, this meant that my tongue couldn’t keep resting against my airway, solving problem 5. If i slept in any other position other than this, brain fog would return. But even with problems 1, 3 and 5 solved, I was still experiencing severe anxiety, waking up after 3 hours with sleep paralysis and panic. So I decided to try and solve problem 4. by placing a bottle between the MAD to stop my mouth closing. 

'Sleep Setup'

This was the final piece of the puzzle. When I did this, I went from sleeping 3 hours a night to 12 hours straight. All my anxiety disappeared. No more sleep paralysis or panic attacks. I was a new person. I had so much energy. No more jitteriness from caffeine - I was drinking 5+ coffees a day and felt like I was high on stimulants the entire time. I was going on dates. I was dancing around the house. I wanted to be outside all the time. I no longer had trouble expressing my thoughts or feelings. I no longer had any interest in introverted activities, such as tv shows or drawing. I travelled and made friends. I walked around the streets at night listening to music. I could run without getting tired. Snowboarding like this was just a mind blowing experience. I had never felt so alive in my entire life and I was living as if I was going to die tomorrow. I did this because I knew that at some point I was going to have to die again in order to live. Not only was the brace giving me an open bite, but this sleep setup wasn’t sustainable. I needed to fix the original problem and do what my orthodontist should have done from the very start - expand the arches and bring that mandible forward. I was aware my symptoms would return but the step needed to be taken so that I could make the real me permanent. 

This is chart showing the severity of my symptoms with my Sleep Setup 

Symptom & Severity 0% - non existent 100% - severe	Pre benzo <2012	On benzos 2012- 2017	Taper/Post benzos  Without Sleep Setup 2017- 2019	Post benzos With Sleep Setup Sept 2019 +
Psychological
General Anxiety Level (note: I never experienced anxiety because of the dissociation)	0%	0%	100%	0%
Dissociation	50%	50%	100%	0%
Need for 11-12 hours sleep to function	100%	50%	100%	70%
Brain Fog (trouble finding right words / concentrating / social situations)	60%	30%	100%	10%
Daytime fatigue	80%	0%	100%	0%
Vivid dreams / nightmares  / dream recall	70%	10%	100%	0%
Sleep Paralysis / Hallucinations	10%	10%	100%	0%
Negative thinking loops / depression	0%	0%	100%	0%
Aggressive if woken	30%	30%	100%	0%
Spacial awareness -trouble with driving, directions, recognising streets/buildings	70%	70%	100%	0%
Psychosis symptoms - audio and some visual hallucinations, intrusive thoughts	0%	0%	100%	20%
Physical
Orthostatic Hypotension	60%	20%	60%	10%
Feet Supination - I walk on the outside of my feet and my knees turn inwards - caused by jaw tension	100%	0%	100%	100%
Anterior Pelvis Tilt -caused by jaw tension	100%	0%	100%	100%
Muscle tension -caused by jaw tension	100%	0%	100%	100%
Cold hands and feet / Sensitivity to cold	40%	40%	40%	0%
Constipation	50%	0%	100%	0%
Exercise Intolerance	70%	20%	100%	0%
***note - benzos solved my jaw tension, which fixed the tension throughout the body
Jaw
Jaw Tension	50%	0%	100%	50%
Ears
Boat - Feels like I’m walking on a boat	0%	0%	100%	50%
Car sickness / motion sickness	60%	0%	100%	0%
Unable to sleep flat since withdrawal	0%	0%	100%	80%
Tinnitus - In March 2018 I slept flat for one night. I woke up the next day with Tinnitus. I’ve had it ever since.	0%	0%	50%	20%
Plane descent - pass out when plane starts its decent	0%	0%	100%	40%
Moving vehicles travelling both Forward and Up/Down at speed - similar to the plane descent, except head feels like it’s being pulled into a vortex	0%	0%	100%	40%
Nose
Nose blocks when flat. - as soon as I lie down to sleep, I get head pressure, my sinuses close. When I wake up I have phlegm and a bad taste in my mouth. As soon as I get on my wedge, my sinuses drain and the pressure is relieved. Report from a previous dentist said its because the drainage in my nose is straight, instead of at an angle	100%	100%	100%	100%

AGGA

I needed to decide which expander to go for - Homeoblock, ALF, DNA or AGGA. I had consultations with Dr Mike Mew (Orthotropics) and Dr Michael White (ALF) in the UK. I am a big fan of Mike Mew and his father John Mew, and their theory on the cause of malocclusion. I think what he is doing is very brave, it takes guts going up against mainstream orthodontics (who would rather paint him as a charlatan rather than the genius he is). I believe that his content on Youtube  will play a big part in creating change over the next decade. A quick look at the Orthotropics Reddit page will reveal how many lives he has already changed. Dr. Mew's proposed plan of treatment was 1. expanding the upper jaw, 2. expanding the lower jaw (couldn't do both at once as there wouldn't be enough space for the tongue), 3. training appliance to ensure good oral posture.

I had seen Dr. White on a list of ALF providers in the UK. I randomly got chatting to a lady in an airport and it turns out that her daughter was seeing Dr. White and she recommended him. I went to see him for an initial consultation, where he said I would need to pay for the 'diagnostic' phase. This would include 10 hours of work; 3 hours of tests in his office, and the remainder for him to compile a comprehensive diagnostic report. He also sent me for xrays and an mri of my jaw. As you can see from the X-ray, face has grown downwards and backwards. The report is quite long (12 pages) but I'll include the relevant points:

"While the overall position of the maxillary bones tin an anterior to posterior position relative to the anterior cranial base is Class I, the position of the mandible relative to the maxilla is classified as Class II (retrograthic)."

"The inclination of the upper anterior incisor teeth is measured at 102.7 degrees (normal = 115 to 120 degrees) which means that the premaxillary bones are retroclined. This affects the mandible, which in turn positions the condyle more posteriorly and superiorly than normal within the fossa of the temporomandibualar joints, impinging on the nerve rich bilaminer zone, which may be associated with the nature of the symptoms you display."

Electrical activity of the resting neuromuscular structures - "resting membrane potential of the left anterior temporals muscle is extremely high at 13 microvolts, where's the right is at 0.3 microvolts (normal = 0.6 to 1.2 microvolts). When asked to clench teeth together, there was a substantial unilateral decrease in the recruitment of the neuro-muscular units within the muscles of the anterior temporals muscle. Only achieved 106 microvolts for the left anterior temporals muscle, and 15 microvolts for the right (normal = 180 to 280 microvolts). This imbalance both in values and distribution is somewhat disconcerting as it creates different tensions around the skill in general on a consistent basis during function. Only achieved 49 mv for the left master muscles, and 39 mv for the right (normal = 280 to 380 mv). Interestingly, when cotton rolls were placed between the posterior teeth and asked to clench, there was an increase in contraction of both master muscles, but still not to a significant degree. Overall, this indicates some form of negative peripheral sensory neurological feedback to the central pattern generator within the brain, that causes an inhibition of your ability to function normally."

Dr. White's proposed treatment plan was 1. Orthotic Appliance Therapy 2. Removable Functional Appliance Therapy 3. Fixed Appliance Therapy (Orthodentic Treatment) 4. Active Orthodentic Retention Therapy.

In January 2020, I went to see Dr. Charles Smith in Heidelberg, Germany. He was one of the few providers of the DNA appliance in Europe. I explained how I was able to improve my symptoms with my Sleep Setup and that I believed that palate expansion would bring my mandible forward and would be the right step in relieving my symptoms. He suggested AGGA would be better suited than the DNA appliance in my particular case. From my research, I understood that AGGA was better suited for forward growth as opposed to lateral growth, but I trusted his assessment. When it comes to people I definitely believe in gut feelings, and my gut was telling me to trust Dr. Smith. I decided to go ahead with AGGA treatment, and they put in elastic spacers the same day. I was to come back in one month where they would fit the AGGA and was to come see him once a month to have it adjusted. The AGGA would stay in for up to 6 months, and afterwards they would fit the Controlled Arch Braces which would stay for up to 18 months. I was looking at treatment lasting up to two years.

AGGA was fitted the following month, and I could no longer sleep with the MAD and bottle which were acting as a bandade for many of my symptoms. Within two days of wearing the AGGA, my symptoms returned. I had been on-top of the world for the previous four months, only to become an empty shell again. Thankfully, during that time the benzo withdrawal symptoms had reduced in severity, and I would say that at 15 months since 'jumping' I was 70% healed from the benzos. However my original symptoms were back full force. I experimented with further sleep setups to try and ease my symptoms. I slept in 4 different sleep setups for at least 7 consecutive days in order to get accurate results. I was in a catch22, as one setup will resolve one set of symptoms whilst causing others. After 4 weeks of experimenting I continued to search for a solution - I needed a position that would enable the ‘hanging’ of my jaw which seemed to alleviate my dissociative and physical symptoms, but without the anxiety symptoms caused by my tongue blocking my airway. So I tried sleeping face down on a massage table, with my jaw hanging down and with the bottle in my mouth to stop my mouth from closing. This was the only position that reduced my dissociation symptoms to a tolerable level. It also resolved all of my physical symptoms including my pelvic tilt, all of my muscle tension, and my foot supination. When I walked, everything flowed better. My stomach/diaphragm was loose for the first time ever, and because of this I could breathe through my nose (albeit sitting up, and with a nasal strip). If I slept in any other position, my tensed jaw would fall back past the 'safe mark', and a tensed jaw caused a tensed stomach and resulted in higher breathing effort. Other symptoms returned - keratosis polaris on my arms and legs, patches of no hair on legs and underarms, really bad dandruff and hair loss at the roots (hair loss had stopped when using the second MAD). Tinnitus was also louder. I also developed insomnia and it took up to two hours to fall asleep. 

Here is a picture of the AGGA after it was fitted. As you can see I have a very high/narrow palate with a ridge. Because my palate is so high there is a decreased nasal area and I cannot breathe through my nose. During the Controlled Arch Braces phase, the lateral expansion should enable the palate to come down.

2.5 month AGGA update

I had over 3mm growth on each side. The front teeth came forward and the top lip looked fuller. I could see no noticeable change/upswing with the mandible. Exactly two months in I started getting a sharp pain deep within my ear on the left side, like an electric shock. Some days it was worse than others and caffeine seemed to make it worse. Other than that, no noticeable improvement in symptoms, although this was to be expected. I still had insomnia but got over 10 broken hours once I did get to sleep. Due to the coronavirus, my first adjustment with Dr. Smith was after 2.5 months instead of 1 month. Dr Smith was pleased with my progress, and we agreed that I would return in 6-8 weeks to fit the CAB, provided I achieve sufficient growth.

Cranial Facial Release (CFR)

Dr. Smith recommenced that I get Cranial Facial Release with a chiropractor called Dr Thomas Meier in Mannheim, Germany. I would have 4 sessions over a period of 2 weeks, where they would inflate a balloon up my nose and manipulate the sphenoid bone which in turn rearranges the cranial bones into a more optimum position. to enable better flow of the cerebrospinal fluid. This was not the first time I had heard of this therapy. I had first heard about it during my consultation with Dr. Mew. Furthermore, Dr. White had explained how the restriction in flow of fluid could be responsible for my symptoms. It turns out balloons up the nose have been around since Richard Stober developed BNS in the 1960s. Following on from this, Dr Dean Howell developed NeuroCranial Restructuring (NCR), and then doctors who trained under him created their own versions of the therapy (CFR, ABC, FCR). According to Dr. Howell, every time you breathe, the bones move and cerebrospinal fluid is pumped. When you inhale, the skull/cranial bones expands, and when you exhale, the skull relaxes/compresses. He further explains that the sphenoid bone also moves - when you breathe in - flexion , when you exhale - extension. When you get traumatised from a rough extraction of a tooth, fall on the coccyx or get whiplash, the motion becomes reversed and affects the whole central and autonomic nervous system and prevents the flow of cerebrospinal fluid. I found this concept fascinating. I could recall at least 7 instances where I had fainted and hit my head, or vice versa. I also had an accident snowboarding where I landed on my coccyx on a metal rail. I also remembered that one of the fainting episodes was followed by vomiting and memory loss. Several years later I had an mri of my brain thinking my symptoms might have been related to this incident, but it came back normal. These accidents/falls all occurred under the age of 18. One of my symptoms following benzos was that my jaw tensed at the end of each inhale. As a result of the jaw-pelvis connection, the pelvis tilts along with the jaw tension. This means that when I walk it feels like I am walking on a boat and am being pulled in different directions. I wondered whether this could potentially be due to some sort of compression when the cranial bones are expanding, or improper motion of the sphenoid bone.

My first CFR session with Dr. Meier was in May 2020. He explained how the procedure was going to work and did chiropractic adjustments on my neck prior to the inflations. He inflated two balloons during the first session, one in each nostril. I felt and heard multiple cracks inside the skull during both inflations. Immediately after the first inflation I felt clarity, and my vision improved. I felt lightheaded afterwards but this resolved in a few hours. I returned six days later for my second session, and two days after for my third session (a further two balloons each session). Changes which occurred:

Breathing - I’ve never been able to breathe through my nose. After the first session I could breathe properly without the use of a nasal strip. My tongue automatically started resting on the roof of my mouth.

Jaw -  jaw has stopped tensing at the end of each inhale.

Compensations in the body - these seem to have resolved. I had some muscle pain in my hips for the first few days; muscles which were previously unused were being activated. My stomach muscles have loosened, and my neck tension has resolved. I used to lean backwards as soon as I sat down, but now I find myself automatically sitting up straight. I can now squat, something I’ve never been able to do. I can also stand still on both legs (I used to have to lean on one leg to achieve balance). Since withdrawal, I have to sleep with a pillow under my back to sleep comfortably - this is no longer needed.

I would highly recommend CFR to anyone who has compensations in the body such as foot supination/trouble sitting up straight. Dr Meier suggested doing another series in two months. However, given how fragile my nervous system was, I decided I would leave it for at least another six months. I was hesitant about including this next section as I didn’t want it to invalidate my experiences with my jaw. However, I felt that the potential benefit this could have for others far outweighed the risk of my opinions considered unreliable due to the nature of my symptoms, therefore have decided to include it.

Psychosis, Adrenochrome and Niacin

The third treatment triggered psychosis symptoms. This had nothing to do with the treatment itself. My nervous system was in such a fragile state that the stress of the procedure was the straw that broke the camels back. After the inflation, my eyes began darting all over the place (nystagmus), my tinnitus got louder, I had burning brain sensation, and a sense of impending doom. That night I woke up to my whole body shaking from the pelvis; with my eyes on the fritz. I was only sleeping in 1 hour bursts. Two days later words began jumping out at me in songs and on television. Severe paranoia began; the feeling of being persecuted. I watched as I was separated from my body (severe depersonalisation). This then triggered delusions of being possessed and of split personalities; my brain coming up with creative ways as to why I felt like I no longer had control over my body. I increased my antipsychotic medication to 2.5mg Haloperidol per day. It took 10 days to start feeling somewhat normal again. A note about the shaking episodes - I began getting these when tapering off benzos. What is interesting is that if I push my jaw forward, they stop. Only to start again when my jaw is back.

My first episode was several months after ‘jumping’ off my last benzo. It followed on from months of feeling paranoid during my taper. One night I started to see scary cartoon faces in my minds eye which would ‘shock’ me awake every time I would drift off to sleep. This coincided with sleeping flat for the first time since my taper. The following morning I had developed tinnitus, burning brain and parodelia (seeing faces in objects). Next I began getting visions upon waking; the visions being of my deepest fears. After that I began hearing things. My brain was trying to find explanations for what was happening to me. I believed many things at the time; that I was being persecuted by entities, that I had been cursed, that I was going through spiritual trials, and that I was possessed. There seemed to be an overall theme related to 1) being persecuted and 2) good vs evil. I had become increasingly interested in Jung’s work on the shadow/unconscious prior to all of this. Perhaps this ties in the nature of the delusions, I am unsure. I was put on 2mg Haloperidol which I later reduced to 1mg per day, which resolved my symptoms to a tolerable level.

When I went into hospital during the first episode, I was looking at a possible schizophrenia diagnosis. They settled for “post benzo withdrawal psychosis”. Could it still be the benzos 18 months out? Possible but unlikely. Could there be something underlying that was brought out by the stress of benzo withdrawal? More likely. I thought let’s entertain the possibility that I may have schizophrenia. What do we know for a fact? Fact - the latest episode followed the same pattern as the first - an initial ‘shock’/scare, followed by tinnitus and a burning feeling in my brain (top middle, on both sides), followed by hallucinations and delusions. Scare > Physical > Mental. Fact - If I take 4 multivitamins at once this seems to reduce symptoms temporarily. Schizophrenia is believed to be caused by overactive dopamine. If this was the case, how could the balloon inflation affect dopamine? And why did vitamins seem to help? Let me introduce you to Dr Abham Hoffer’s theory. He believed that schizophrenia was caused by a build up of adrenochromes, which are formed from adrenaline. These are metabolised in a healthy nervous system, but in schizophrenic patients the adrenochromes build up and produce symptoms similar to LSD. He claimed you could reduce these adrenochromes using megadoses of Niacin (Vitamin B3). In theory, the balloon inflations could have caused the body to release adrenaline. The only way to test this theory was to try out Hoffer’s megadosing cure. It was now 17 days since the last episode and my remaining symptoms were racing/intrusive thoughts and paranoia, which the antipsychotics didn’t seem to resolve. I had ordered 500mg Niacinamide, which is 3125% of the daily recommended dose. Normally Niacin gives you an intense flush/burning sensation, but this was the slow release/non-flush version. I took a pill, and sure enough the racing/intrusive thoughts disappeared. I began taking one in the morning and one at night (1g/day). I was extremely tired for the first couple of days. A week later and I hadn’t had a single intrusive thought (I had been getting these relentless intrusive thoughts from my past). I could also think a lot clearer, and my paranoia was gone. My friend, who I had been staying with, noticed a significant change; enough that he actually brought it up and said you’ve been different since last Saturday. Another friend who I visited said she had never seen me so calm and centred. Another thing I noticed is since withdrawal, I would feel lightheaded/spacey after drinking coffee - this resolved immediately after starting the niacin. I was extremely excited about this discovery, and immediately read Hoffer’s book “Niacin: the real story”.

 

Hoffers recommendation was to start with 500 mg niacin daily, then gradually increase the dose at seven day intervals, over four to six weeks, to reach the target dose of 1 gram three times per day. Vitamin C was to be taken one gram three times per day. And Vitamin B6, 250 mg per day. Later, Hoffer often prescribed a B-50 complex tablet twice per day instead. My plan was to follow Hoffer’s guide and build up to 3g of Niacin per day, before attempting to taper off the Haloperidol. In theory, if I stayed on the Niacin and didn’t experience another episode then this would support the adrenochrome theory. Update: Niacin proved to be inaffective in reducing psychosis symptoms.

Dissociation / DPDR

During the four months with the Sleep Setup, I was mostly free from dissociation. Currently I am able to reduce dissociative symptoms by sleeping face down with my jaw hanging loose. I would say that I am now in a pretty good position to describe what life is like with DPDR. It feels like you are in a dream, everything looks flat/2d, objects don’t have depth, inability to appreciate views/beauty, don’t ‘feel’ feelings, no real thoughts, detached from body, perception of what you look like in mirror/pictures vs real life is different, no real identity, can’t connect with others, difficulty expressing thoughts, operating ‘manually’ in social situations, all senses are dulled. When watching a movie dissociated, my eyes will lock onto the entire screen and won’t move, taking in ‘the big picture’. When I am not dissociated, my eyes will lock onto the eyes of the person talking. Similarly in group social situations, eyes will automatically lock onto the eyes of the person talking. and I can take in their facial reaction as I am talking. When I am dissociated, my eyes will gravitate top-left most of the time trying to process information. I’m not even aware of the persons face, instead my brain is just trying to figure out what it’s trying to say. I have also noticed when I was dissociated I used to be able to look at a scene/room and take in what I saw in its entirety - when not dissociated, my eyes seem to only be able to focus on one specific point at a time. I mentioned ‘no real thoughts’ when dissociated. This is hard to explain but I don’t experience thoughts the same way. Thoughts don’t just ‘pop up’ without a trigger. For instance, I could sit in silence for hours without a thought popping into my head. Same with falling asleep, I would fall asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. When I am free from the dissociation, I get thoughts popping into my head all the time, especially if I am not doing anything. When dissociated, you are sort of pushed into a more introverted mindset, and I used to watch a lot of tv and draw. When my dissociation clears, I lose interest in both, and prefer to socialise.

Controlled Arch Braces 

It was end of June 2020 when I went to see Dr. Smith. AGGA had been on for 4 months 10 days, and I achieved 5 mm of growth. Dr. Smith pointed out that I was looking a lot better than two months prior, especially in the eyes. It took under 2 hours to take off AGGA, clean off the cement, put the brackets on, and feed through the wire. An FRLA was placed on the top (I already had one on the bottom from when AGGA was fitted). The FRLA makes it a little difficult to keep the tongue at the roof of the mouth, but I expect I will get used to it. There was pain for the first couple of days, and could only eat soft food for the first 3-4 days. After the first few days, the bracket on my bottom right molar came off. Dr. Smith warned this may happen, and to ask an orthodontist to clip off the excess wire.

Top 3 current symptoms - Vestibular System

1. Sleeping flat - I had been unable to sleep flat since the start of my benzo taper. If I try and sleep flat, I get head pressure, my head begins spinning, I have insomnia, wake up after 3 hours feeling aggressive, and am wrecked the following day. I also wake up with swollen hands/fingers.

2. Migraines & Motion - the Sleep Setup cured my motion sickness. When AGGA was fitted it returned. It starts with a car/bus journey. I feel extremely dizzy, sensitive to light and sounds, then get a migraine. I take a Migraleave for the pain, but still feel extremely sick for the next few hours. My body will alternate between hot and cold and I will get racing thoughts. This usually lasts about half an hour. Then starts the burping, sometimes vomiting. The episode will end suddenly, and ill go from curled up on the bed one second, to completely fine the next. 

3. Plane Descent - Since the start of my benzo taper, I have experienced severe anxiety (like nothing I've felt before). For some unknown reason, whenever I'm on a plane and the plane begins it's descent, I get temporary relief from the anxiety, as if someone had flicked a switch. Upon landing, the relief lasts a couple of minutes before the anxiety sets back in. My theory is that this somehow ties into the vestibular system. Either something to do with the build up of pressure, or alternatively the "falling" sensation tricking the brain. What I can say, however is that I took a flight the day of my psychosis after having tapered off the Haloperidol. As soon as the flight began it's descent, I experienced instance relief from the racing thoughts and delusions, again, like someone had flicked a switch. This is important because it indicates that my psychosis symptoms correlated with anxiety. I went to see an ENT in September 2020 hoping to find answers, but she didn't find anything wrong with my ears, other than a lot of calcification, which is supposedly due to a large number of ear infections as a child. This takes me back to one of Mike Mew's videos, where he describes how he used to frequently walk past the ENT department, and noticed that all the patients in the waiting area had malocclusions.

Reich, the Ocular Segment and the Schizoid Type

I decided to go in another direction to address the remaining psychosis symptoms, this time the Reichian route. There has been success treating schizophrenia through the Reichian/orgonomic therapy approach. The first time I heard about Reich was on this website  A man by the name of Plato Powers had palate expansion, NCR and experimented with Face Pulling - the act of pulling the face forward by attaching elastic bands to braces and pulling forwards and upwards for a set amount of time each day (I will address face pulling in a later section). According to Reich, the body can be divided into seven muscular segments: the ocular, oral, cervical, thoracic, diaphragmatic, abdominal, and pelvic. He discovered a specific energy in the body (orgone), and suggested that if this energy flows freely through the body without any hindrances or blocks, the individual functions in a healthy manner. However unhealthy individuals will experience ‘Armouring’ - the chronic sympathetic contraction of specific groups of muscles to hold back specific feelings and memories. This is done by holding the breath and tightening the muscles in the various parts of the body. Because armouring does not allow emotional expression, there is no adequate discharge of excess energy, which builds up until it overflows in the form of symptoms. 

The first segment includes our eyes and head. When we have ocular armour, our vision can be skewed and distorted, and we misinterpret, feel more fear and confusion, experience blurred vision at times, miss cues, and can create an entire world-view based on unclear perception. Elsworth Baker summarises this perfectly in the following section: “Psychosis is produced because of the eye block, as it causes a split between sensation and the perception of that sensation. Thus sensations, which remain strong in schizophrenics, are not properly perceived and may be interpreted as "forces," "electric currents," or "machines," which work on them through "evil persons" or influences” link. Armoring in the ocular segment “consists of a contraction and immobilization of the greater part of all of the muscles around the eye, eyelids, forehead, and tear glands, as well as the deep muscles at the base of the occiput, involving even the brain itself”. This idea that there is a split between the sensation and perception of the sensation was spot on - my delusions involved things like being possessed, or my body being out of control. This in fact is not the case, but my brain perceives the sensation to be separate from myself.

Plato refers to Reich’s five archetypes, namely the schizoid type. Each of the five types have a corresponding body structure, which is determined by their armouring. I really identified with the schizoid type and found it painfully accurate. Here are excerpts about the schizoid structure - “Tall and Very Thin - A narrow, tall and contracted body is most frequently associated with the schizoid character. The base of the skull is often tight and the arms and legs are tight and stiff as well. The diaphragm remains frozen. The eyes tend to be sunken and void of expression with a mask-like appearance on the face. There is frequently muscular tension in the pelvis, chest, neck and shoulders. The weight is often carried on the outside of the feet. Often the hands and feet are cold. This is an indication that all of the energy has withdrawn to the core and the arms and legs are cut off for survival purposes. A schizoid is not a good hugger as they are suspicious and have difficulty trusting in others” link. “Agenda: The world is a scary place. There is no one to be trusted. I do not belong here. There is something wrong with me. You can have my body but you cannot have me”. “The typical compensation for the Unwanted Child is the escape either into spirituality, virtual reality, or a narrow vertical form of skill specialisation which they master in a rigid perfectionistic way, and within which they can operate safely” link. This last quote is extremely accurate; I would often escape into video games when I was younger, and have found a profession in which I feel 'safe' in by approaching each task in a perfectionist way. A few years ago I tried moving into a different industry but it was too overwhelming and I quickly moved back to what felt 'safe'.

So, how do we treat it - how do we de-armour? The principle of therapy is quite simple: merely to remove the chronic contraction which interferes with the free flow of energy throughout the organism and thus restore natural functioning. Plato explains that “the palate treatment is changing the shape of the ocular segment as it relieves compression that was caused by the initial wisdom teeth extraction.” He suggests that as you relieve the compression and unblock the ocular segment, you’ll be a different person and that your psyche will adjust. “You will change your personality and be able to feel and express again. You will see things with clarity”. Out of all seven segments, the ocular segment is the most difficult to release, due to difficulty in access - face pulling and NCR changes all of this. Similarly, Ian Hedley was also someone who had expansion, NCR and face pulling - he was patient 0,. Ian was supposedly non-functional (he had become this way following tooth extractions when he was younger) - after 1-2 months of face pulling, he became functional again and eventually became a different person. You can see his before and after video here.  He is a lot more attractive and confident in the second video, with a more alpha dominating energy. My gut is telling me that face-pulling is something I should investigate further down the line once my first premolars have come forward. In the meantime, I decided to follow the exercises as described in Reichian Therapy The Technique, for Home Use, by Jack Willis, which can be found at this website.

Jack Willis was very adamant that these were powerful exercises. And he was right - it was October 2020 and I began with the daily exercises as detailed on page 36. These include work on the eyes, the shoulders and the diaphragm. The eyes exercises involved looking at yourself in the mirror through the eyes of someone else, and answering a series of questions, as well as emulating various emotions with your eyes. After about 30 seconds of emulating emotions I became extremely nauseous and had to lie down. I have decided to put the exercises on hold until I am more stable.

NeuroCranial Restructuring (NCR)

It was January 2021 and I went to see Agata Nikta in London for a NCR series. NCR is all-encompassing - it involves an assessment and bodywork, from which they determine which of the 6 areas to balloon. When they do the balloon you are placed on various wedges and are asked to hold a specific position. After the balloon, I experienced symptoms which I attribute to trauma release - dissociation, nystagmus and racing thoughts. Last time I had CFR the symptoms were severe, but this time they were more manageable. My first night's sleep was very unpleasant - waking up gasping for air, nightmares and night sweats. NCR usually takes place over 4 consecutive days, but we thought it best to spread them out to once a month, to reduce symptoms. My next session will be in February. Upadate: I have put NCR on hold until I am more stable.

Lucid Dreaming

I have a history of lucid dreaming and false awakenings. Usually I will become lucid deep into a false awakening loop and the process repeats itself until I am out of the loop. I tend to write messages down on paper in the dream so that I'll remember them when I wake up. I remember a particularly memorable one where I tried to get a message to myself throughout about 5 loops which read "Dreams are a simulation". That has always stuck with me for some reason. Since taking Haloperidol, these seemed to stop, or I don't remember them. In December 2020 I had my first lucid dream in a long time. By January 2021 they were occurring once a week, and by February 2021 every second day. The sequence of events is always the same. I am either half-asleep in real life, or half-asleep in a dream. I remain calm with a blank mind, and set an intention of where I want to go/what I want to see. My body will then begin vibrating. Then I get a rush similar feeling to an MDMA come-up, where my head feels like it's being propelled into another dimension. Then my ears begin ringing so intensely loud that it's excruciating. As this gets more and more intense, I start floating, being pulled up by my coccyx. Then the visuals begin - I am either flying at top speed through a vortex or a cloudy sky. After what feels like 20 seconds, I get dropped off to wherever I've set my intention. I've achieved a lot of the things I've wanted to in the past month or so - getting closure from my ex partner, and spending time with my deceased father. My intention over the coming weeks is to face my shadow, and get to the root of whatever is going on. I was watching an interview on Gaia about lucid dreaming, and learnt that you can successfully resolve trauma in your lucid dreams because you are dealing directly with the unconscious mind. When I wake up from said dreams I have a short period of time where I can hear many different voices talking over each other. I believe this is refereed to as hypnagogic hallucinations, something perfectly normal which happens between the sleep/wake state.

General Update

 

It had been 27 months since I jumped off benzos and can safely say that I am 99% healed in terms of withdrawal symptoms. I still get the boat feeling when walking and suffer from tinnitus. The intolerances (lactose) and cat allergy that I developed shortly after starting benzos in 2012 are gone. The intolerances I developed during withdrawal (alcohol, coffee, msg etc) are all gone, with the exception of matcha which causes withdrawal symptoms to resurface temporarily (nausea, derealisation, anxiety and balance problems). I am now able to breathe through my nose and have been maintaining good tongue posture. Since breathing through my nose at night, I no longer experience sleep paralysis. I am still sleeping on a raised wedge as I get head pressure, blocked sinuses, insomnia and anxiety if I try and sleep flat. If I sleep face down with my jaw hanging loose I wake up anxiety free, but this is difficult in practice given that I can't sleep flat. My right jaw joint no longer clicks and I am trying to hold my jaw in a forward position. It was March 2021 when I went to see Dr Smith - It had been 3 months since my last adjustment due to the coronavirus situation. My premolars have now come forward on the top, and now the molars need to come forward. I had a resurgence in my psychosis symptoms in March 2021, but luckily the symptoms weren't as severe as 2019, just intrusive/racing thoughts, words jumping out on TV and songs and delusions of persecution. I increased the haloperidol to 4mg/day. I had a breakthrough with NAC 500mg - it took away intrusive thoughts, but caused depression. These findings could indicate that the intrusive thoughts could be caused by excess glutamate, possibly because my GABA receptors are still down regulated. NAC is thought to up regulate the glutamate transporter that removes excess glutamate from the nucleus accumbens. i came to a realization after this resurgence in symptoms, that I can throw as many supplements as I like at the problem but this isn't going to cure my psychosis. I therefore came up with a 3 step plan - 1. EMDR 2. Reichian Therapy 3. ECT - three therapies that have shown improvement in psychosis symptoms. My gut was telling me to try the Reichian Therapy first, given that it's the only therapy that's ever cured schizophrenia, but my psychiatrist recommended I do EMDR with a specialist in London called Annamaria Mazzeschi. I did 6 sessions and unfortunately I didn't respond to the stimulation. One is supposed to feel body sensations and strong emotions when stimulated, but I felt nothing. I believe this is due in part to the medication - I am now on 3.5mg Haloperidol and it's hard to feel emotions on it. I put the EMDR on hold, with a view to reduce the medications in a few months' time and try again.

 

Jaw Release 

 

On the 18th May 2021, I heard a brief high pitch ringing in my ears. The jaw tension and stomach tension subsided in an instant, and so did many other symptoms as a result. Thanks to my stomach muscles being released, I was able to take full breaths through my nose. My mood immediately improved, and I suddenly had motivation to do things. A few days later I tried lying flat, and was able to do this without the symptoms I had developed post benzos when lying flat - insomnia, anxiety, head pressure and jaw tension. I can now sleep without the wedge I had been using for the last few years. Other changes occurred. When walking the back leg would get jammed and wouldn’t go all the way back - this no longer happens. It now takes less effort to sit upright as the compensations have corrected themselves. I no longer have motion sickness, something I have suffered with my whole life. I went from struggling to work 2 hours a day, to increasing my work to 4 hours a day and now have the motivation to do actually do it. These are essentially the same effects I had when on the Sleep Setup - this is because it forced my jaw to rest and get partial relief from the tension. In the end I was right - it was as all about the jaw! 6 weeks have passed, and I have had no psychosis symptoms since my jaw released. My persecutory dreams have ceased, and I no longer think people's caughs and sneezes are directed at me (an unfortunate symptom which developed in benzo withdrawal). What is interesting is I didn’t get any psychosis symptoms while using the Sleep Setup, when my jaw was forcibly relaxed. Update: dissociation and anxiety has resolved completely since my jaw released, but I am still experiencing psychosis symptoms.

 

General Update

 

It was late October 2021 when I woke up one morning and my pacing had significantly reduced. Since post benzo taper I had been unable to stand still, for instance when waiting in a queue or on a train platform - I used to have to pace. I assumed this was a side effect of the Haloperidol, but low and behold, it was benzo related all along. My foot and toes still shake when I am sitting still, but I expect this will go away in time. It’s like they say on the forums, if you didn’t have a symptom before benzo withdrawal, you won’t have it when you’ve healed. I pray this holds true for the psychosis as well. I’ve developed a new symptom in the last few months - sleep talking - all night throughout the night, funnily enough mostly in French, a language I am fluent in but rarely use. A quick google search indicates this can be linked to sleep apnea, which I’ve tested for twice and don’t have. It’s described as a parasomnia, along with night terrors and confusional arousals, both of which I do have. I stay in hostels often, and a girl I was sharing a room with pointed out my sleeptalking to me in October 2021. Ever since 2 further people whom I’ve shared a room with in the past month have noted the same. I wonder what the cause is - given that I am nearly 3 years out from stopping the benzos and starting the Haloperidol. What I can say however, is that I am gaining more control over my lucid dreaming. There seems to be various levels/depths to it, once I’ve passed through the intense ear ringing and vibrational stage: 1. I set my intention on seeing visuals 2. I am sat in a movie theatre watching the visuals 3. I enter into the visuals flying full speed through the sky 4. I am walking and interacting with the simulation. I have also begun experimenting with astral projection, but this I am hesitant about it because it always leads to sleep paralysis where either 1. I am confronted with some sort entity/entities, and 2. I can hear multiple voices talking over each other. Having experimented, the only solution I have found to escaping these experiences is holding my breath - this forces me to wake up. Although I mentioned previously I am now able to lay flat without the anxiety or other symptoms, I have discovered that I still get brain fog the following day. Therefore I have resumed the use of the wedge for sleeping. Over the last 6 months I have developed Tinea Versicolor, or “mushrooms” as my GP calls them. It began on my neck, spread to my shoulders, and has now spread to my chest. It leaves discouloured patches on the skin. According to my GP, these develop when the ph of the body is off.

 

Current symptoms

• Brain fog when sleeping flat (delay in comprehension and walking slightly behind people when walking together) [solved: sleeping on a wedge]
• Tinnitus
• Boat feeling when walking [this came back just before laser eye surgery due to anxiety]
• Insomnia and arousals [solved: placing a soft chunky duvet under my pelvis]
• No appetite - Loss of appetite started whilst in benzo tolerance
• Vestibular migraines
• Psychosis symptoms (persecutory delusions and triggers) [relief when plane is in descent]
• Orthostatic hypotension accompanied by loss of vision when standing up
  
• Tinea Versicolor
• Nightmares
• Mild depression 
• Racing thoughts
• Dizziness/Head sensations when stressed
  
• Fatigue - need 12 hours of sleep to function (original symptom since teenage years)
• PCOS
• Thrush
• Creaking wrists and finger joints
• Low blood pressure (last reading 90/50)
• Low blood oxygen level (last reading 93%)
  

It was end of November and I decided to quit Snus (nicotine pouches). I went cold turkey, the cravings only lasted 3 days. However the depression which ensued was unbearable. I couldn’t get out of bed, and wasn’t able to work, and instead would just stare at the screen. I lost interest in socialising. Dissociation also came back slightly. I made it to 2.5 weeks and had to go back on, as I begun making mistakes at work. As soon as I took my first snus, I was back to normal again. Perhaps the snus is giving me that little bit of dopamine which is being blocked by the haloperidol. Either way, I won’t be quitting again any time soon.

It was January 2022. I had previously been doing 23:1 fasting, as I felt more clear headed with more energy. During the Christmas holidays I was with family so eating 2 full meals a day. I became extremely tired, sleeping 12+ hours, couldn’t get out of bed, was suicidal and put on a ton of weight. Come the 1st January, I went back to fasting 23:1 and decided to go vegetarian primarily because I had gone vegetarian previously I lost a lot of weight and felt better. When I was put on the Haloperidol I weighed 53kg. I now weigh 67kg. My goal is to lose 7kg and I will update on my progress. The fatigue is now gone thanks to the fasting and I have my (limited) energy back. The suicidal thoughts stopped within a few days of starting fasting. It had been suggested that the ketogenic diet may affect the activity of the excitatory neurotransmitter glutamate, something which I will look at further down the line.

On another matter, I have discovered that if I drink 3+ redbulls my tinnitus is substantially quieter. My theory is this could be due to the 1000mg of Taurine each can contains. There have been studies linking taurine to a reduction in tinnitus in rats (don’t ask me how they measured it). Interestingly taurine is also the top supplement recommended for psychosis. A clinical trial conducted in Melbourne in 121 young patients with psychosis found that 4 grams of Taurine per day reduced psychotic symptoms within just 12 weeks. My tinnitus started the same day as my psychosis, so one might argue cure the tinnitus, cure the psychosis. I have ordered NOW 1000mg taurine supplements. I would also like to reintroduce NAC - as previously mentioned, it helped with breathing effort and racing thoughts, however caused depression. I’ve begun taking Atarax occasionally to sleep. It’s a prescription antihistamine, and helps me get to sleep within half an hour of I’ve overdone the coffees and snus.

I’ve been supplementing with 1000mg Taurine and 500mg NAC. When I do this, I get the following relief: 1. Decreased breathing effort 2. No more racing/intrusive thoughts 3. Decreases ‘loudness’ of thoughts. 4. No more flashing images when I close my eyes 5. Reduced nightmares. This indicates that my remaining problems are still related to GABA-Glutamate balance, ie. benzos. Side effects include insomnia, and moderate depression the following day.

Weight Loss Journey

It was December 2021, and as I ate my second slice of apple tart of the day, my mother interjected with “no wonder you’re fat” - harsh, but maybe what I needed to hear to kick start my weight loss journey. 1kg fat is equal to circa 7000 calories, therefore to lose 1kg a week you must create a calorie deficit of around 1000 calories a day. I cut out all alcohol, processed sugar, meat, dairy and most carbs. Please note I am doing no exercise during this time aside from minimal walking.

Below is my weight loss measured every Sunday on a vegetarian 23:1 fasting diet:


2nd Jan 66.7kg
9th Jan 65.7kg
16th Jan 64.5kg
23rd Jan 63.4kg
30th Jan 63.2kg (had 4 heavy meals out this week)
6th Feb 62.5kg
13th Feb 62.0kg (reintroduced fruit)
20th Feb 61.8kg

 

I continued the diet for several weeks but was unable to lose further weight; I figured instead of forcing it I should just focus on maintaining that weight. The diet took a moderate amount of willpower, but was made easier by the fact I have had no appetite since being in benzo tolerance. My meal consisted of unlimited vegetables, a mix of pak choy, okra, spinach, courgette, asparagus, cavalero negro, tenderstem broccoli, tomatoes, mushrooms and eggs. I ate as much as I wanted and stopped eating when I was full. Drinks included coffee, water and coconut milk. Note that after a week or so my craving for sugar and carbs disappeared. In terms of mindset, this improved considerably - I was able to handle stress a lot better. Now that I have achieved a healthy weight and reaped the mindset benefits, I have decided to maintain my weight and mindset by eating a 23:1 vegetarian keto diet. Numerous studies have suggested keto is beneficial for psychiatric disorders. I will therefore start adding healthy fats into my diet.

General Update

The combination of Taurine and NAC is alleviating many of my symptoms. When I am on the supplements, I notice an increased interest in listening and enjoying music, and sometimes singing along. Funnily enough, my tinnitus got louder when supplementing Taurine with NAC. However the adehonia and insomnia side effects are problematic.

I travel on planes on average 4 times a month. As mentioned previously, I get full relief from psychosis symptoms whenever a plane begins its descent, up until the plane hits the tarmac. I had previously thought this to be related somehow to the vestibular system. I read up on supplements that help with ear problems and I decided to give Ginkgo another try. I had previously tried 20mg, with no effect. This time I tried 120mg twice a day. This immediately offset the depression caused by the NAC. The first day of trying Ginkgo, was the closest I’ve felt to myself since pre-benzos in 2012. I decided to come off the NAC an Taurine, in order to test it effectively. In the days that followed, I experienced 1. Better sleep 2. Easier to get out of bed 3. Ability to work my 4 hour work day without feeling overwhelmed 4. Motivation. I got all of my admin done in one day, and even managed to do some cleaning (which is a big deal for me!). I felt like I had finally found the key - with one caveat, some people on benzobuddies experienced rebound symptoms 2-3 days after cessation, due to ginkgo being gabagenic. The last thing I would want is to be taking it for months or even years, and then be faced with rebound PAWS all over again.After 5 days on ginkgo 240mg, my depression, motivation and concentration issues had resolved. However I developed severe anxiety, an intolerance to caffeine, increased breathing effort, and dark circles under my eyes. I decided to add NAC back into the mix - this helped with the anxiety a little bit and reduced breathing effort for about 12 hours or so. And the ginkgo offset the adehonia and insomnia caused by the NAC, therefore they are extremely complimentary. The other thing which I thought was interesting is I began listening to classical music whilst on ginkgo (my usual genre is rock/electronic). I could no longer tolerate my usual music.

The key takeaway here is both NAC and ginkgo affect the GABA/Glutamate balance, therefore this proves that some of my remaining issues are still due to the benzos. I am 3 years out from my last dose. There have been reports on benzobuddies of people that have taken up to 5 years to heal, but all of them heal eventually. I had a video call with my psychiatrist and he, like the ones that came before him, says there is no way my symptoms are linked to benzos this far out. As much respect as I have for him, he’s wrong - I had severe derealisation up until around 2 years off (which started the same day as I made my first cut of clonazepam) as have many others on the forums.

I took my last ginkgo at 9pm on the 21st January, due to exasperating anxiety (I developed fear of flying and social anxiety - something I’ve never experienced before). Most of the anxiety dissipated around 2pm the following day, my taste in music reverted back to my usual genres, and the dark circles under my eyes disappeared. My original symptoms also returned, which was to be expected. I have decided to come off all gabaergic supplements and let my brain heal in it’s own time. Note: fear of flying disappeared after I stopped the ginkgo. There was some residual social anxiety which gradually dissipated over a few weeks.

Hair Analysis

I did a hair analysis with Mineral State in the UK back in 2018. The report showed elevated mercury and very high tin levels. I was too Ill at the time to look into it any further. The report stated “It has been reported that an excessive level of tin can interfere with iron metabolism and will produce heme breakdown. Elevated tin also increases the excretion of selenium and zinc from the body.” I decided to get another hair analysis done. If my tin and mercury levels were still abnormally high, this was something I needed to address. It was February 2022 when I got my results from Mineral Sate - heavy metals came back low, and the tin levels had decreased to a normal level. The only abnormal finding was an extremely high level of magnesium and titanium. The titanium is likely due to the wires in my mouth. As for the magnesium I have been using epsom salts every night, which I have now ceased. Despite the results, my motto is if I find something that makes me feel even 10% better, I’ll take it. Therefore I started detoxing heavy metals by drinking a heavy metal detox smoothie every day when I broke my fast. This consisted of coconut milk, spirulina (2 tsp), barley grass (1 tsp) Atlantic dulse (2 tbsp), wild blueberries (1 cup) and cilantro. The following information on how these supplements work is taken from the Medical Mediums website:

• Spirulina: draws out heavy metals from your brain, central nervous system, and liver, and soaks up heavy metals extracted by barley grass juice extract powder. 
• Barley grass juice extract: prepares the metals for complete absorption by the spirulina. This nutritive grass has the ability to draw heavy metals out of your spleen, intestinal tract, pancreas, thyroid, and reproductive system. 
• Cilantro: Goes deep into hard-to-reach places, extracting metals from yesteryear.
• Wild blueberries: Draw heavy metals out of your brain tissue, healing and repairing any gaps created by oxidation when the heavy metals are removed. The potent antioxidants in wild blueberries help reverse any oxidative damage left behind by the heavy metal removal. This is especially important for your brain tissue.
• Atlantic dulse: In addition to mercury, this edible seaweed binds to lead, aluminum, copper, cadmium, and nickel. Unlike other seaweeds, Atlantic dulse is a powerful force for removing mercury on its own. Atlantic dulse goes into deep, hidden places of the digestive tract and gut, seeking out mercury, binding to it, and never releasing it until it leaves the body.

I added in a teaspoon of powdered vitamin C into my heavy metal detox smoothie. Side effects of the smoothie included a burst of energy. I had to remove the Barley Grass Juice Powder from the mix shortly after, as it was giving me allergies (I am allergic to grass). The burst of energy ceased once I removed the Barley Grass Juice Powder.

 

August 2022 Update: no improvement from Heavy Metal Detox Smoothie.

Cavitations

I watched a fascinating documentary on Gaia (now banned from Netflix) called Root Cause, about a man called Frazer Bailey that spent years suffering following an infected root canal. Here is a link to a brilliant extract from the documentary, which I think many people can relate to. I had my 4 wisdom teeth removed as a teenager, circa age 14. If the periodontal ligament isn’t removed, this can be a breeding ground for bacteria and toxins, which furthermore become even more toxic if combined with heavy metals. These infections are called cavitations. They literally destroy the bone, and there are reports of literal gunk being in there and a terrible smell upon opening the areas. Research shows that the bacteria in the dead bone can actually combine with metals and create a neurotoxicity in the body which results in a myriad of neurological symptoms from tremors, to brain fog and even Alzheimer’s because the bacteria eventually enter the bloodstream. As previously mentioned, I developed fatigue and brain fog as a teenager. Could this be contributing in any way to my remaining symptoms? Could a potential infection have played a part in making my withdrawal symptoms from benzos so severe? Could a build up of toxins play a part in psychosis? Back to my motto, if it makes me feel at least 10% better, I’ll take it!

I decided to contact the Munro Hall Clinic in Bedford, one of the two places in the UK that have a Cavitat machine. I first heard of this place after reading an account of a man who had suffered from CFS and was healed after multiple cavitation surgeries Link. There is also a report of a lady whose tinnitus healed after 30 years from cavitations surgery Link. I found several more testimonials whose tinnitus and other health issues resolved following dental treatment Link. Furthermore, each tooth is on the meridian system, and the wisdom teeth are directly related to the inner ears and central nervous system. The tooth chart can be found here.

Unfortunately the Munro Hall Clinic could not work with my while I was undergoing orthodontic treatment, as this can result in false positives on the Cavitat scan. They recommended waiting for at least 6 months after the treatment was complete. We are now looking at early 2023. In hindsight this is probably for the best, as your immune system needs to be strong to deal with the toxins released during surgery. In a years time I will be better equipped to deal with this. In the meantime, I will focus on detoxing heavy metals, fixing my diet and letting my GABA system heal. On a further note, I would like to emphasise that my tinnitus started on the same day as my psychosis, so one can assume the same thing is causing both symptoms. Cavitation surgery on extraction sites and root canals, along with the removal of mercury fillings (and mercury chelation) are the only things documented which have cured tinnitus (based on testimonials). It is therefore logical to do the surgery in order to test this theory, and see if there is any improvement in symptoms.

Controlled Arch Braces Update

The treatment time is taking longer than expected, as Dr Smith pointed out I’m a difficult case. I have been in CAB for 19 months and treatment is expected to last at least another 6 months. I currently have an overbite, but am training myself to hold my jaw forward during the day. Since the treatment started, my jaw clicking had completely resolved, which indicates some movement must have taken place. I can now breathe fully through my nose, albeit with some resistance. Below are some before and after photos which were kindly provided by the dental office.

 

 

March 2022 Update & Action Plan

Over the last 6 months I have gradually lost interest in things I used to enjoy: snowboarding, painting, games, reading, baths, sunbathing, gym and television. I still enjoy socialising and work, but have to force myself to do it. I am still only working 4 hours a day, and this is the maximum I can do per day before burnout. I work from my bed as it takes too much energy to sit upright at a desk. I wouldn’t say I’m depressed as such, just lack the energy to pursue my hobbies and do normal things. Note: I don’t think this is due to benzos or psychosis - fatigue begun as a teenager and gradually got worse over the years. The racing thoughts have now ceased - I am unsure what the instigator was - Diet? Heavy metal detox? GABA system healing? Whatever the cause, I am just grateful it’s gone, as it has been non stop for 3 years. In terms of addressing my remaining symptoms (specifically the lack of energy and psychosis), my plan is as follows:

1. Septoplasty
   
2. Carnivore Diet
   
3. LASIK eye surgery
   
4. ACC Mercury Chelation
5. EAV Assessment at the Atman Clinic in London
6. Cavitation surgery at Munro Hall Clinic in Bedford
7. Experiment with beta alanine (report of someone's schizophrenia going into remission)
8. Schedule a consultation with Dr Amir in London to look at skeletal symmetry
9. Go to the States and get bioresonance done using the lecher antanae (as per documentary Root Cause)
10. While in the States, consulation with Dr Gerald H Smith (to look at alternative medecine)
11. Get a lab to seperate and remove the Terpene Trilactones (ginkgolides and bilobalide) from Ginkgo to get ear effects without the impact on GABA

I’m well aware readers may be thinking I’m barking up the wrong tree, and that I perhaps should be addressing all of this from a therapy perspective - as many people have suggested. I can assure you if I thought it would help, I would do it. In terms of my fatigue symptoms, I genuinely believe there is a physical cause, as I started falling asleep during the day as a teenager. In terms of the psychosis symptoms, I get relief when a plane is in descent - from all triggers. I literally sit there for 20 minutes in amazement as I revisit prior thought processes and cannot identify with them. I am convinced it is somehow tied to the vestibular/GABA system. Further note: I was free from symptoms when I took ginkgo, and when I flew on ginkgo there was no period of relief during the descent, as I was already at baseline. I refuse to live with psychosis and my remaining symptoms, therefore I will do everything in my power to find a solution, no matter the cost and no matter how absurd - I’d like to reiterate Einstein’s quote: “only those who attempt the absurd can achieve the impossible”.

Breakthrough Lightbulb Moment

It had been 2 years since last using the Sleep Setup, on which I had felt like a brand new person. The derealisation, anxiety and brain fog caused by my tensed jaw in a pushed back position was gone since the split second jaw release incident, but I still felt more or less terrible. When I experienced stress or excitement, instead of feeling the emotion, I would get strange pulling sensations in my head/ears, which would get exponentially intense for the duration of that emotion. I had been maintaining a closed mouth and nasal breathing since getting CAB. I had a lightbulb moment in March 2022. I was particularly excited about something, and of course came the head sensation. I experimented. I pushed my jaw forward whilst breathing through my nose - no relief. I opened my jaw wide whilst breathing through my nose - no relief. I closed my jaw but opened my lips and breathed through my mouth - all head/ear sensations stopped. My initial thought was that this isn’t a problem related to the position of my jaw, since it was closed when experiencing relief. This had to do with the very act of breathing through my nose. But no symptoms when breathing through the mouth. Why? The only noticeable difference from what I could tell, was that breathing effort was at what felt like 0% through the mouth, and 40% through the nose; ie there was a lot more resistance when breathing through the nose. My immediate reaction was to put on a Breathe Right nasal strip to test the theory of whether increased air flow would lead to decreased breathing effort thereby solving the head/ear sensations. Sure enough there was significant improvement, not 100% but I would say I was 75% of the way there. When using the nasal strip I noticed I no longer got head rushes when standing up (which would usually involved losing my vision for a few seconds). Fatigue was greatly reduced and overall mood was good. How do we increase nasal capacity permanently? First stop, Septoplasty. I had been referred to Dr. Mochloulis in London for a Septoplasty several years earlier, but was too unwell to go ahead with the procedure. I decided to get back in touch and schedule the procedure for May 2022

 

Laser Eye Surgery 

 

I got laser eye surgery done in October 2021. The operation was a success. The PAWS boat sensation symptom returned just before due to anxiety. I responded wwll to the medications (Zyrtec and Atarax) they gave me to calm down, except I have no memory of getting home that day. I now have perfect vision, which is a beautiful gift. There were auras around lights at nighttime for the first few weeks, but these gradually dissopated. However, I've noticed recently when I look at the moon it morphs into 3 moons. When looking at peoples faces in dim light, they distort slightly (going in and out of focus), which is a trigger for making me question my reality - not ideal. I visited the eye doctor 'Vision Future' in Nice where I got my original surgery (highly recommend them), and they detected mild astigmatism in both eyes, which hadn't been corrected by the original surgery. Astigmatism can cause issues at nighttime when the pupils are dilated, and ties in with the nature of my symptoms. I scheduled corrective eye surgery for June 2022. Since getting the surgery, people's faces no longer distort. My vision is now 12/10, which is microscopic.

 

Keto > Ketovore > Carnivore

 

I am a huge fan of Jordan Peterson, who incidentally also suffered from severe PAWS and whose story has brought attention to the dangers of benzodiazepines. In one of his talks he referred to a meat diet, recommended by his daughter, Mikhaila Peterson. She was able to cure her autoimmune disease, anxiety and depression by eating a diet of beef, salt and water. I am currently eating a vegetarian ketogenic diet, and although my limited energy is increased, my hair has started falling out in clumps. Eating fats instead of carbs is clearly working in some areas, however I believe the lack of protein is causing issues. I am curious as to what I could gain from the carnivore diet, specifically in relation to psychosis symptoms and general mood. Could some of my symptoms be linked to an immune response to food? There is a report of an elderly woman with lifelong schizophrenia who went keto, became symptom free and was able to come off all of her medications Link. My initial thoughts are this could either be due to an immune response to food or the very act of being in ketosis affecting the neurotransmitters. Either way, I need to test out this theory, therefore I reintroduced beef daily (ketovore) in mid May 2022, with a view to go carnivore in mid June 2022. Two weeks into reintroducing beef daily, I noticed slightly increased motivation, particularly in terms of getting out of bed. Could be placebo, I won’t know until I’ve gone full carnivore and measured properly. As Mikhaila puts it in one of her talks: “If you can’t get out of bed in the morning, something is wrong!”. It is early June and I am eating “ketovore” - one meal a day (as I am not hungry), mainly beef and animal products (bacon, eggs, cheese, milk) and a side of vegetables (generally okra). I usually end up eating two thirds and then taking a break for a couple hours before finishing the last third. Side effects of ketovore include constipation. No other negative side effects to note. My gums, which had turned pale (a possible symptom of anemia) went back to a normal colour. The white coating on my tongue also went away. August 2022 update: this diet resolved creaking wrists and fingers, but had no improvement in mental health.

 

Septoplasty

I had a consultation with Dr Mochloulis in April 2022. Don’t be fooled by his name - he’s a very experienced and capable ENT surgeon. We had a good connection and I trust I am in safe hands. I was diagnosed with a deviated septum with columellar dislocation and nasal obstruction bilaterally. Possible complications of the septoplasty include infection, bleeding, nasal adhesion, perforation and possible change to the shape of the nose. I was all in; anything to get that 10%. I had a 20 minute pre surgery assessment call with One Hatfield Hospital, where they went through my medical history. I stressed that I was not to be given any benzodiazepines and listed it as an allergy to be sure. I was asked to quit snus (nicotine pouches) at least a week before surgery. The last time didn’t exactly go down a treat, but I have no other choice. It was 27th May 2022 and I arrived at One Hatfield Hospital at 7am. I was greeted by a nurse who showed me to my room. I was asked to change into my hospital attire and told to wait. I was visited by the anaesthetisist, where he took me through the procedure, as it was my first time under general anaesthetic. They wheeled me into the operating theatre and the anethesiasit kindly asked me lots of personal questions to keep me distracted. Then all of a sudden BANG I felt the anesthetic, mumbled something about feeling high, then next thing I remember is waking up in the ward with a tube down my throat. Immediately after waking up I remember being able to breathe better - however the swelling and bleeding soon took hold. This was a good indication of what was to come when healed. Note: I did not have a splint/packing in my nose. My jaw and stomach were extremely tight when I waking up, which gradually dissipated over the following hours. I was wheeled back to my room, where a nurse would check up on me periodically and take blood pressure. I was fed a delicious sandwich (cheating on ketovore, I know). I was discharged at 6pm and a friend came to collect me. I never once had any doubts or worries about the surgery, and the only difficult thing was quitting snus. It took 3 days for the bleeding to stop. I was given paracetamol, codeine, a laxative (for the codeine), ibruprofen, sterimar, antibiotic drops and some cream. By day 3, I could breathe well through my right nostril. It took several weeks to breathe through the left nostril.

General Update

It is now July 2022. Since starting the carnivore diet, my wrists and fingers no longer creak, and hair loss has reduced. This is the only improvement I can ascertain. I had weight gain of 3kg on carnivore. I reverted back to a 23:1 fasting ketogenic diet in August 2022. I lost the 3kg I put on during carnivore. My nose has now healed fully from the Septoplasty; healing took circa 6 weeks. There was no apparent improvement in nasal breathing at first, but now that a few months have passed and the swelling as gone down, I would say there is a 25% increase in nasal capacity. Use of nasal strips at night are still creating great improvement - no head rushes upon standing, less cognitive delay, less head sensations and less procrastination. I still experience relief from symptoms during plane descents (fatigue disappears, breathing effort reduces, thoughts become 'normal', emotions come back). This is by no means a normal thing to experience, therefore I decided to seek a more alternative route. I previously wrote about a fascinating documentary called ‘Root Cause’, which explores the journey of a man who had health issues due to a toxic root canal. The tool which finally diagnosed him was something called “BAH” at Innovative Medecine. I have booked a consultation in New York in August 2022. There is a halt in my progress with CAB. The left side is not expanding, and my top jaw seems to have shifted to the right. I visited Dr. David Cook in London as my wire came undone; he suggested I would need another 1 year of treatment, This would bring us up to 3 years in CAB. 3 years is incidentally the longest he has seen someone in CAB. My last psychosis episode was in April 2022, and I had to increase the Haloperidol to 5mg per day. Symptoms included intrusive persecutory thoughts and scary intrusive images when I closed my eyes. I had my bloods done, which came back with high lymphocytes (since teenage years), and elevated C reactive protein (new).

Two Trains of Thought

Thought 1: Cavitations. Dr Weston Price discovered that root canal teeth were causing medical conditions, ranging from arthritis to psychiatric disorders. He tested his theory by placing the tooth in question under the skin of rabbits, who would then become sick with the same illness as the host. An example of this is a rabbit who developed arthritis 48 hours after the tooth was placed beneath the skin. Dr Price would repeat the experiment in several rabbits, all whom developed the same illness. Removal of the root canal tooth from the patient allowed them to heal from said illness. From the research I have done on cavitations, I learnt that the toxins coming from cavitations at wisdom teeth extraction sites tend to be the same if not worse than those from root canals. I should further note that cavitations cause 2 separate problems: 1. They create a burden on the immune system due to infections (white blood cells being sent all the time to fight infection weakens the immune system), 2. Toxicological burden due to the toxins produced by the bacteria.

Thought 2: Tinnitus. I’ve note before my tinnitus and psychosis started on the same day. I don’t believe this is a coincidence. I strongly believe the same thing is causing both symptoms. Removal of mercury amalgams, cavitation surgery and ACC mercury chelation are the only things which have cured tinnitus, based off of patient testimonials online. One can therefore assume tinnitus (excluding that which is caused by loud sounds) is caused by a toxic overload in the brain, whether it be mercury or bacterial toxins. This would explain why there hasn’t been an official cure.

EAV

I was scrolling through the chronic fatigue forums, and came across a book written by the husband of a chronically ill woman, each chapter describing a different diagnostic/healing modality link. The tool which finally diagnosed her was something called Electro Accupuncture according to Voll, or EAV, which diagnosed her with 2 cavitations. She was cured from her symptoms following surgery. “EAV uses an electronic probe to measure the electrical resistance at numerous points on the body (primarily the hands and feet). It measures the electrical current moving through the acupuncture meridians and as such gives information about the bioenergetics of the body. An EAV machine is an instrument of physics not chemistry and as a result is not recognised by mainstream medicine. In the 1950’s Dr Voll, a German doctor, observed that traditional acupuncture points had a lower electrical resistance than other skin points. He developed a device to measure the skin’s resistance at these points and found that each point had a standard measurement for all healthy people. He concluded that increases from this normal reading meant there was tissue inflammation associated with that point. Decreases from the normal reading indicated that there as fatigue or tissue degeneration associated with that point.” Link. I booked a consultation at the Atman Clinic in London on the 18th August 2022. I was hoping they could identify if I had cavitations in my wisdom teeth sites. Some dentists use EAV to identify if an infection is present in the jaw bone.  Cavitations can block the body’s energy meridians. Such blockages and their locations can be revealed through Electro-dermal Screening, according to the following Link. Voll, the physician who invented electrodermal screening, estimated that approximately 80% of the chronic illness he saw in his patients stemmed from dental related problems.

I arrived at the Light Centre Monument in London on the 18th August 2022. The Atman Clinic is based in the suburbs, but operate from this centre one day per week. I met with Geoffrey Montague-Smith, a very kind and gentle man. He clearly explained how EAV worked. Levels in the red means the body is actively fighting something. A yellow reading means the body has given up fighting over a long period of time. He diagnosed me with a Cavitation Level 2 (the most severe is a level 4) in the top left hand wisdom tooth area. This was the only yellow reading during the session. Other teeth has red readings. Other red readings included Liver, Food allergies, and lymphatic drainage of the jaw. He prescribed me the homeopathics RLX Milieu and MYC-Tox to help with the liver issues. These were tested for compatibality using EAV. However, I reacted poorly to these, with air hunger and heart palpitations as side effects. In any case, this was a great first step towards cavitation diagnosis. I was curious to see if BAH would identify anything dental related, as it had done for Frazer Bailey in Root Cause.

 

 

Bioresonance Analysis of Health (BAH)

According to the NYCIM Website, BAH "utilizes quantum physics principles such as resonance phenomena and holographic information, as well as advanced scientific tools to identify all hidden determinants of disease and dysfunction on all levels (physical, biochemical, psycho-emotional, and spiritual). This precise medical system enables the practitioner to decode the information pertaining to all aspects of health within a patient. It is like a truthful conversation with the patient’s intelligence.” Link. The website goes on to explain “the modern-day patient displays a series of symptoms that can be retraced to a number of dysfunctions, normally extremely difficult to identify. To understand a patient’s entire history, a practitioner must have the ability to retrieve all information pertaining to all aspects of their health. By properly decoding the subtle information within a patient (all possible information – not just limited areas as in other diagnostic methods) using Bioresonance Analysis of Health, medical professionals may access a world of healing possibilities and identify all sources of dysfunction and personalize treatment.” Link

BAH looks at over 25 key parameters including toxicity levels, pathogens present (virus, bacteria, parasites, fungi), presence of emotional/electromagnetic/geopathic stress, autonomic nervous system function, tissue pH, nutritional deficiencies, allergies, dysbiosis of the microbiome. Usually once a diagnosis has been made, patients are places into generalized treatment protocols. However, the cost for treatment is up to $2,500 per day, and treatment can last several weeks. I am unable to afford this at this time, therefore am just going for the diagnosis. I had an initial Consultation with Caitlin Policastro. I gave her my background and she explained a little more about BAH. She performed a comprehensive energetic testing that looks at heart rate variability called HeartQuest. More information can be found here. I won't go into details on the results, but suffice to say I was not in good health. It identified a 'life force' of 24%, and heart rate variability was nearly flat (positive results show high variability). Caitlin also took a drop of blood for the BAH. The following day I met with Dr Thomas Szulc, the creator of BAH. He took me through the results. Overall, it looked like I was in pretty bad shape. My toxicity levels were a 16/17 out of 21 (8-10 is the acceptable range). He noted this was mainly from vaccines. Very interesting, considering my symptoms worsened after getting 3 vaccines in 1 day (something I will discuss further in the ACC section). He noted one particular vaccine with a spike protein was causing issues. This, I believe is caused by the covid vaccine. Another interesting point he mentioned was that I had an inflamed pelvis; this would explain why I have to sleep with a chunky duvet under my pelvis to avoid insomnia. I will list a summary of the results of the report below:

• Toxicity (Biological Index): 16-17 out of 21; 8-10 being the acceptable range. Dr Szulc suggested this was from vaccine toxins. However, this also takes into account heavy metals. More information can be found on the scale here.
• Energy (Energetic Balance): No 
• PH (Tissue acidity vs alkalinity): Acidic 
• Autonomic Nervous System (Sympathetic vs parasympathetic balance): Blocked 
• Cell-to-Cell Communication (cellular signalling): No 
• Infections (Pathogenic organisms): Yes. Active infections include EBV (virus), H Pylori (Bacteria), Flukes (Parasite) and Aspergillus/Candida (Fungus). I have a Scheduled an appointment with my GP in September 2022 to be tested for these to verify. 
• Dental Issues: Yes. Dr S noted I had cavitations on my lower 2 wisdom teeth extraction sites. These are different teeth to those indicated by EAV. I will get a cone beam scan to verify. 
• Allergies: No 
• Solvents (Chemical toxicity): No 
• Heavy Metals: Yes. I will address this in the section on ACC. 
• Stressors (EMF and geopathic influences): No 
• Micro biome (Dysbiosis of the gut): Yes 
• Organ Function (Most impacted organ): Stomach 
• Emotions (psychological stressors): Yes. It should be noted Dr S didn’t go into detail on these, as he explained there is no point addressing the emotional side until the body is detoxed.

The treatment plan was a combination of IVs, energy medecine, homeopathics, minerals, vitamins and chelating agents. As previously stated, I am not able to afford treatment currently at Innovative Medecine. My plan to address my current symptoms is as follows:

1. Address the infections by getting tested by my GP to verify the diagnoses. Treat using antibiotics as per GP’s recommendations. If this fails, order the Energetic medicine recommended by Innovative Medecine.
2. Start heavy metal chelation in October 2022 using the Andy Cutler Protocol. I don’t believe chlorella is an effective chelater, especially for the brain. Having read Andy Cutler’s book, I trust his research on the science behind Alpha Lipoic Acid.
3. Get a Cone Beam Scan to test for cavitations in my wisdom teeth areas. The Munro Hall Clinic won’t work with my while I’m in braces, therefore I have contacted Elmar Jung’s clinic in Southampton, who have assured me braces aren’t an issue for their CavitaU scanner. The appointment is on the 5th October 2022.
4. If the above items do not substantially improve my health, I will get a loan and proceed with treatment at Innovative Medecine in July 2023.

Infections

I went to see my GP in September 2022 to be tested for the infections diagnosed through BAH. The results are as follows:

• EBV (virus) - blood results came back positive for antibodies anti-VCA/EA and anti-EBNA.
• H Pylori (Bacteria) - blood results came back negative.
  
• Flukes (Parasite) - stool test and liver xray came back negative.
  
• Aspergillus/Candida (Fungus): Aspergillus/Candida blood tests came back negative. 
  

I had high hopes for BAH, but unfortunately too many of the above diagnoses were incorrect. In addition to these I was diagnosed with 2 cavitations on my lower 2 wisdom teeth which came back clear when scanned, which I will address in the next section.

Cavitations

 

In October 2022, I went to see Dr Elmar Jung in Southampton, to be tested for cavitations using their Cavitau scanner. They were only able to scan the bottom teeth, as it appeared my top back molars had been pushed back into the wisdom tooth area. I will get the top wisdom teeth areas scanned after my dental treatment is complete. The Cavitau scanner measures bone density and I am including the results so readers can get a better idea of what to expect. The green dots indicate the bone is healthy, whereas red dots would indicate cavitations.

OPG (before and after AGGA)

 

Please see OPGs taken before AGGA treatment, and 27 months into Control Arch treatment. The top molars have been pushed back into the wisdom teeth areas. I am unsure how this happed, but will be asking Dr. Smith for his thoughts.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Daytime Fatigue Solved

As previously mentioned, I developed chronic fatigue which came on gradually in my late teens. I would need 12 hours of sleep to function. I would wake up however, more tired than when I went to bed, and the fatigue would gradually lift over the day, and by evening time I would feel almost normal. I have been using incline therapy (a wedge) for sleeping, as I discovered this reduces my brain fog. In October 2022, I accidentally fell asleep with my head propped up on 2 pillows on top of the wedge (head considerably elevated), and woke up after 12 hours, feeling the same as when I had gone to bed the previous night. This is huge progress. I tested this for the following week to confirm my findings and can accurately say there is a correlation between elevation of the head during sleep, and sleep quality / fatigue the following day. Here is an interesting article I found which may provide some answers, although there is limited research. In addition to my fatigue being resolved, my proscrastination has also improved. I used to save things like work, showering, answering messages and admin for the evenings when I had enough energy, but am now able to do these in the mornings. I am now able to work from a café, instead of from bed. Words can't quite describe how I feel, I am just grateful it's one more thing ticked off the list.

Andy Cutler Chelation (ACC)

My mother had a mouth full of amalgams when she gave birth, and I broke a mercury thermometer several years ago and played with the mercury. Furthermore, I had 3 vaccinations in one day 2 months prior to my first psychosis episode; Hepatitis, Tetanus and Yellow Fever. I had a bad reaction to the Tetanus shot and nearly fainted. I now recall this being a turning point, as I dissociated within 30 minutes of getting the injections, and delusions of persecution started soon after. I was too ill at the time to make the connection. In the 2 months which followed there was a steep worsening of my symptoms, and after 2 months woke up one day with tinnitus, worsened persecutory delusions, racing thoughts, paredealia, and visions when I closed my eyes. Given that this was 4 months since coming off benzos and I still had over 30 benzo symptoms, doctors attributed this to “Post Benzo Withdrawal Psychosis”. Given the episodes kept reappearing several years later even on medication, my diagnosis was changed to “Psychosis with elements of schizophrenia”. Was there even a minute possibility my psychosis symptoms were linked to the vaccines? There is an account of a young man called Eric Gladen who wrote a documentary called Trace Amounts, he himself going into psychosis following a Tetanus vaccine. His symptoms included seeing images when he closed his eyes, which started off as faces and landscapes, but later turned scary, which is the same thing which happened to me. I don’t see any harm in chelating mercury in order to test this theory. I have been doing the Medical Medium’s heavy metal detox smoothie, with no noticeable improvement in symptoms. After more research I came across Andy Cutler’s book “The Mercury Detoxification Manual”. The following is an excerpt from the book in relation to psychological symptoms as a result of Mercury: “As the poisoned person becomes more toxic, the disease progresses and psychological symptoms may develop into an outright mental illness such as bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, anxiety disorder or obsessive-compulsive disorder”.

Andy recommended starting on a low dose of Alpha Lipoic Acid, say 25mg-50mg (sicker patients need to start even lower), dosing every 3 hours (even through the night), 3 days on / 4 days off. The idea is you want to keep the ALA steady in the bloodstream to avoid mercury redistribution. Andy himself was poisoned by amalgam fillings and healed himself through this protocol. Normally you have to wait a few months following the removal of your amalgams to start the protocol; luckily I’ve never had a filling. Andy suggests every time you do a round try increasing the dose of ALA until you feel symptoms that are bearable, and then hold that dose. If you take high doses of ALA and feel nothing, then you don’t have a mercury problem. Some success stories can be found here.

I found a UK supplier called Mandimart that sold low doses of ALA (at an extortionate price). Given how sensitive I am to supplements I thought it wise to follow Cutler’s advice and start on a low dose: I ordered ALA 25mg to be safe. Cutler recommended taking the “Core 4” every day alongside ALA. These consist of Magnesium, Vitamin C, Vitamin E and Zinc. I began taking these daily 2 weeks before starting chelation. I also joined a gym for access to the sauna; Andy recommended getting saunas to help excrete the heavy metals. Below is a summary of rounds listing amount of ALA and side effects:

 

• Round 1: 14/10/2022 - 25mg - On-Round: tinnitus quieter on 3rd day / Off-Round: no symptoms
• Round 2: 21/10/2022 - 50mg - On-Round: severe insomnia 

Due to severe insomnia caused by the ALA, I had to abort the experiement.  

 

1 month update of sleeping with raised head

 

I’m still sleeping 12 hours but am no longer lying in bed all day. Procrastination is improved, but not resolved. I am excelling at work (which had been reduced to 2 hours a day). I can now support my own weight and sit at a desk to work. I am also now sitting up straight in public instead of slouching. I am no longer eating and working in bed. I can now work and listen to music at the same time, as before it was taking all my focus to do basic tasks. My appetite has increased. I still can’t believe the act of raising my head during sleep is making such an impact, but if I don’t my brain fog comes back. I can confidently say bed incline therapy has resolved my brain fog.

Vestibular System Expert

It was November 2022 and I still had some unanswered questions. Why did the brain fog resolve when I slept with my head substantially elevated? Why did my psychosis symptoms resolve when I was in a plane in descent? The latter had previously led me to believe there was some connection to the ears/vestibular system, and I had tried taking Gingko, which produced severe side effects. I decided to find a specialist in London, and came across Mr Paul Montgomery, who specialised in vertigo, dizziness and balance problems. What attracted me to him initially was a quote on his website: “If you listen carefully to the patient they will tell you the diagnosis”. Having been shut down by an ENT I visited a few years ago, being told my symptoms were due to anxiety, I decided to send Mr Montgomery an email with a brief overview of the relief I get from symptoms sleeping elevated and on a plane, suggesting I would go ahead with the appointment if a) he believed me, and b) had some ideas about what could be the cause. He responded saying he would likely be able to help. I scheduled an appointment with him on the 22nd November at the Cromwell Hospital in London. He diagnosed me with PPPD and referred me to a vestibular physiotherapist called Amanda Male. Her recommendations were graded exposure to triggering activities rather than avoidance. She said I need to weane myself off the wedge, by learning how to accept the body sensations and lowering the level of threat and be able to “ride the storm” without a fight or flight reaction. She also recommended mindfulness. I was hoping to get more answers as to why I get relief from symptoms, but I’ve come to realise that nobody has answers.

December 2022 Update

Sleep talking, lucid dreaming and astral projection have all stopped. Psychosis symptoms have reduced slightly in the last month, without any change to the medication, or any significant life changes - generally thoughts are more normal (focused on every day tasks, instead of paranoid thoughts) and no more delusions around messages aimed at me on tv. The only explanation for this is that the psychosis symptoms were due to benzo withdrawal, as originally proposed. Please note I am now exactly 4 years out from my last dose. This would be in line with the fact my racing thoughts stopped on their own in January 2022. My current remaining symptoms are sleeping 12 hours (since teen years), inability to feel laughter or appreciate music like before, intrusive thoughts, thoughts feel like they are external, delusions of persecution, vestibular migraines, tinnitus and inability to sleep flat. I tried sleeping flat one night in December 2022 as I didn’t have my wedge and experienced severe physical, auditory and closed-eye hallucinations as I was falling asleep. The thought related symptoms (intrusive thoughts and thoughts feeling like they are external) cease when I am in a plane descent. Let’s assume for a moment all my symptoms are caused by benzo withdrawal / PAWS - what can we do to speed up healing? The forums say there is only one thing - time. However, I’ve seen various reports of people undergoing NAD+ infusions who have seen great progress. Best case scenario, my symptoms improve, worst case it triggers a reaction or negative symptoms. I’ll take the 10%. There are several NAD+ clinics in London and I plan on proceeding with the treatment in 2023. Interestingly, NAD was recommended by BAH (see previous section), even though I don’t fully trust its reliability as they were wrong about many things.

NAD+ Supplement

I thought it wise to try NAD+ as a supplement before proceeding with the infusions, to see whether I tolerated it. I found a reputable seller in London which can be found on Naddirect.com. The name of the supplement is NAD+ Optima Max. It’s quite pricey at £69 for 1 months supply. It contains 100mg of high quality NAD+, 2 pills to be taken each day. The supplement arrived in January 2023. Having watched David Sinclair’s podcast with Joe Rogan, I then went down the rabbit hole investigating NR and NMN. After hours of research, I decided to buy Tru Niagen (NR), with a view to test it after the NAD+. It appears like some people sometimes respond to some supplements more than others when it comes to NAD+, NR and NMN. What’s also interesting is you’ll note in a previous section I experimented (unsuccessfully) with mega doses of niacin for psychosis symptoms according to Dr Hoffer’s work. Dr Hoffer found that some of his patients responded to NAD and not Niacin, however his funding got cut and he wasn’t able to proceed with NAD trials on schizophrenic patients. Although I mentioned BAH was wrong about certain things, I would like to point out they were the first doctors in 15 years who proposed NAD+ for my condition(s). Their treatment plan proposed 8-9 infusions. I will start with 5 infusions and see how I go. I did a lot of research before purchasing the NAD+ and NR - here is an article which matches many of my findings.

Update: I stopped taking Tru Niagen and switched to Epigenetics NAD+ 500mg in February 2023.

First PAWS Window

In early January 2023 I had my first (what the call in the benzo community) “window”. This is defined as a period of time where you have either no or reduced symptoms.

Day 1 - subtle focus and increased appetite, cleaned my room (Jordan Peterson would be proud), read a whole book in evening

Day 2 - Woke up after 10 hours instead of 12 hours, made my bed (first time in years), increased focus, faster metabolism, hungry, tinnitus quieter at night

Day 3 - Woke up after 8 hours, no craving for morning coffee, hungry at lunchtime (first time in over 10 years), Singing along to music, opened my blinds (first time since I moved back home 2 years ago), hungry, hyper focused at work

Day 4 - Jumped out of bed after 8 hours, worked 5 hours straight no breaks, hungry

Day 5 - Woke up after 9 hours

Day 6 - Hyperfocused at work no breaks, cleaned the flat, started drawing again, still making bed every morning

Day 7 - Tinnitus still quieter at night, blood pressure is still on the low end 108/71, no need for morning coffee anymore

Day 8 - Tinnitus has halved, energy & focus

Day 9 - socialising non-stop without getting tired or going quiet or pausing before speaking, waking up looking forward to the day ahead, paranoia better, setting more boundaries with people

Day 10 - woke up after 8 hours, drawing again, afternoon coffee seems less important

Day 11 - Painted for the first time in over a year, woke up after 6.5hours full of energy, socialising has become easier

Day 12 - woke up after 8 hours, no coffee all day, worked on new painting

Day 13 - woke up after 8 hours, have completely reshaped boundaries with friends, energy & focus, best I’ve felt in my entire life

The window lasted about 5 weeks, before symptoms set in again. From what I’ve read on benzobuddies, the ‘windows’ get longer and the ‘waves’ get shorter. The fact that it took 4 years to have my first window demonstrates I am one of the more severe cases. But I now know I will heal. The wave came back during which my symptoms came back and I mostly lay in bed in silence. I discussed this with my psychiatrist - he doesn’t believe in PAWS and said it sounds more like Bipolar, and suggested Lactimal as a potential treatment. I told him I would wait until the end of the year to see how things would play out before considering adding in another medication.

NAD+ Infusions

I decided to contact the NADClinic in London in January 2023, which is the same company who own Naddirect.com where I purchased the pharmaceutical grade supplements. They were able to offer 5 infusions of 1,000mg of pure NAD+ at £1,750. They said it normally takes 2 hours per infusion, but patients can slow the drip as much as they like to tolerate symptoms, which can include nausea and chest tightness. They said it’s absolutely fine to work while you are getting the infusions. They recommended spacing the infusions within a 1 to 2 week period. I booked my first infusion on 4th February 2023. I received a health questionnaire to complete - it listed one of the possible side effects as ‘death’, and I effectively signed my life away. My thinking was if this can cure my remaining psychosis symptoms and allow me to come off the Haloperidol, then I was all in.

The clinic was very clean and the staff were inviting. The room I was in consisted of 5 comfortable reclining chairs. My nurse went by the lovely name of Charm made me feel very comfortable. There was also the option to watch Netflix while getting the infusions. There was a table with water and lollipops (which supposedly help with the stomach pain). Please note I was getting 1,000mg of NAD+, which is double the normal dose they  normally offer. I spaced the infusions by 1 week at a time so as to not overload my system. Results are as follows:

• Infusion 1: 4.5 hours. Side effects included feeling spacey, nausea, stomach pains, diarrhoea and very cold. A very uncomfortable treatment, not for the faint hearted. I should note the side effects stopped as soon as the drip was removed. I was in control of the drip so could speed it up as much as I tolerated.
• Infusion 2: 1.5 hours. Side effects much less severe this time; mild spaciness, mild stomach pain and nausea.
• Infusion 3: 2 hours. Side effects were much less pronounced, just some spaciness.
• Infusion 4: 2 hours. No side effects.
• Infusion 5: 2 hours. Mild spaciness.

It was end of March 2023 when I completed the last infusion. I felt much more present/clarity and psychosis symptoms (delusions of persecution) were gone, with the exception of thoughts feeling like they are external and intrusive thoughts (which goes away when I am in a plane in descent). Monthly vestibular migraines were much less severe in the months that followed, and I was no longer bedbound during these episodes. I plan to start my taper from the Haloperidol in April 2023. I am now the closest I’ve been to fully functional and can begin to look into working more hours.

Vestibular Migraines

I get monthly vestibular migraines when my oestrogen levels drop. This is one of my few remaining symptoms, so thought it wise to look for a solution. I scoured the internet, and the natural approach suggests taking coq10, magnesium and vitamin B2. I had been taking nightly magnesium salt baths for the last few years and this didn’t appear to have an impact. I decided to experiment with coq10 in February 2023. Doses of 150mg-300mg have been used in human studies. I found that a combination of coq10, magnesium and Migraleave reduced the intensity of the migraine by around 80%.

Haloperidol Taper

I just discovered a great song by EURINGER and Grimes called “The medicine does not control me”; a fitting song for my Haloperidol taper journey. The NAD+ infusions resolved my delusions of persecution. If I was healed, the true test would be my reaction to decreasing the meds. In addition, I missed laughing uncontrollably and I missed my emotions, both of which were repressed by the medication. The Haloperidol also causes something called ‘flat effect’, which makes your voice sound monotone and results in a lack of facial expressions. I have also developed small uncontrollable jaw movements, which can be a sign of tardive dyskinesia: circa 30% of those on Haloperidol develop this with long term use. Haloperidol needs to be tapered very slowly, and my psychiatrist agreed to reduce from 5mg to 4mg in April 2023.

These is an interesting study about Haloperidol taper and withdrawal which can be found here. It is suggested that 5mg blocks most of the dopamine receptors in the brain, whereas 1mg blocks nearly 60%. Please see the following chart. This would indicate that the lower you go, the more difficult it will be. The study suggests it could take years for hypersensitive dopamine receptors to return to normal. 

 

11/04/2023 - Cut from 5mg to 4.5mg - vivid nightmares first few days. Head sensations worsening as day goes on. I’ve decided to wait until completely stable before next cut, instead of rushing it. Back to baseline on 23/04/23.

30/04/2023 - Cut from 4.5mg to 4mg - vivid nightmares during first few days. Head sensations which persisted for several weeks (tingling, crawling and off balance sensations).

My psychiatrist suggested staying on this dose for a few months before reducing further. I should note the jaw movements stopped soon after decreasing to 4mg. I will stay on this dose until August 2023 and then look to reduce to 3mg.

May 2023 Update

Delusions of persecution are 100% resolved since the NAD+ infusions. I am now able to take on more work and will be working 4 hours a day starting from June 2023 (up from 2 hours a day). My most problematic remaining symptom is the hypersomnia (sleeping 12+ hours to function), intrusive thoughts and thoughts feeling like they are external). The hypersomnia was a pre existing symptom I developed in my teen years. I feel better and better as the day goes on, and feel my best from about 10pm onwards. This suggests that there isn’t an emotional component to it, or else I would feel just as bad throughout the day. I was thinking back to the 4 months when I used the “Sleep Setup” and for the first time in my life woke up with a peaceful mind, a positive mindset and with lots of energy which was stable throughout the day. The symptoms had unfortunately come back as soon as AGGA was fitted and I could no longer use the Sleep Setup. My theory is that due to my malocclusion (recessed maxilla and mandible), the positioning of my lower jaw in its natural position when tensed is irritating something (as to what, I don’t know). This would explain why when I slept with the Sleep Setup, which pulled my jaw forward and open, my symptoms went away. It was June 2023 and I came up with a plan to experiment. I decided to order a Jawzrsize and experiment sleeping with it. The Jawzersize is a device which is used to strengthen the jaw, sold in the US. It will be suitable for nighttime as it has a necklace (so you don’t swallow it in your sleep) and is designed for the mouth, as opposed to what I had done previously when I used an Olbas Spray Bottle for the Sleep Setup. Results: As soon as I force my jaw open and forward, thoughts come to a halt and there is a sense of inner peace. Unfortunately it’s too uncomfortable to sleep with so am unable to test the results overnight. I have made an appointment with a jaw specialist in September 2023 to see if he has any ideas why this may be happening.

Second BIND window

They are now calling benzo injury: BIND - benzodiazepine induced neurological dysfunction, therefore I shall refer to it as BIND instead of PAWS going forward. I had another window which started on 21st June 2023. I felt good until 17th July 2023, and then symptoms gradually came back over the next 10 days. During windows, I get the following relief:

• Get by on less sleep
• Good focus at work
• Energy
• Can socialise for longer
• Tinnitus barely present 
• Increased appetite 
• Interest in reading and drawing returns

My psychiatrist is leaning towards bipolar and wants me to start lamotragine, but my gut is telling me this is benzos. He had stated there is no withdrawal from lamotragine but I came across a YouTube video by Witt-Doerring which proves otherwise, based on patient feedback. In addition I don’t get any of the standard manic symptoms such as inability to sleep, impulsivity, spending and fast talking.

July 2023 Update

BIND symptom feeling like I’m walking on a boat has returned. Flashing images when I try and sleep have been gone for quite a while; I believe I can now attribute this symptom to benzos. There has been huge improvement in the past year, which makes me hopeful for what’s to come in the coming year. My dream is to one day live a normal life and be able to work full time. Vestibular Migraines have increased to 2 per month. I would like to do another round of NAD+ but insurance doesn’t cover it and I can’t afford it. As mentioned previously the use of an extra 2 pillows in addition to the wedge for sleeping have resolved daytime fatigue and brain fog. I experimented for 3 days without the pillows and symptoms returned immediately - 2 to 3 hour naps during the daytime were needed the following days.

 

 

 

 

I hope you found this blog helpful and informative. Please direct any enquiries to dentaldisaster2020@gmail.com